50 best excuses why a racehorse didn’t win its race

by MikeB · April 12, 2021

Dr Desmond Morris says that when a racehorse loses a race the trainer and the jockey have to find fancy reasons as to why it happened other than the fact that the horse is not a fast runner in order to ensure that the horse’s owner retains the trainer and pays his monthly fee which is very high. A horse has to win an inordinate number of races in order to justify the amount it costs to look after and train them.

50 excuses why a horse didn’t win a race in order to convince the owner to keep paying stabling and trainers fees. Image by Andreas Iken from Pixabay

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Here are the 50 best excuses:

The horse:

swallowed it’s tongue;
stepped in a rabbit-hole on the far side of the track;
was hit by a flying divot;
swallowed a flying divot;
disliked the tight bends;
was stung by an insect down at the start;
was distracted by a television van;
did not like the rain;
had an abscess in his mouth;
had a sore foot;
did not want to go past the racecourse stables;
suffered from a muscle spasm;
did not like the high winds;
was lazy or was not keen enough or was too keen;
was bumped during the race;
was kicked during the race;
disliked the slow pace or disliked the fast pace;
jumped too carefully or over-jumped;
felt crowded in the large field of runners;
missed the competition in the very small field of runners;
did not act on the hard going/did not act on the soft going;
hated the left-handed track or hated the right-handed track;
was under-worked or was over-worked;
would improve over a shorter distance or needs a longer distance;
missed the start and then had too much to do;
was stuck in the face of a rival jockey’s whip;
was too inexperienced or too experienced;
bolted on the way to the start or bolted at the off;
was hemmed in and could not find a gap;
travelled badly during the long journey to the racetrack;
suffered from exhaust fumes inside the horsebox;
had been upset by fireworks near the stables the night before;
lost a plate;
had come into season;
hit the front too soon or needs to be a front runner;
was off its feed;
needed the run-out;
should not be whipped or needs stronger handling;
needs castrating;
may have a low blood count.

The horse’s:

champion sire did not reach peak form until he was much older;
saddle was slipping or was too tight and was pinching;
girth-strap broke.

The jockey:

thought there was another lap or thought there wasn’t another lap;
mistakenly thought something was wrong and pulled the horse up;
dropped his whip;
mistook the last furlong post for the winning-posed and eased off;
was kicked during the race.

The handicapper had been too severe and the horse was carrying too much weight;
The stable has a virus.

One apprentice jockey was asked to explain why he had ridden the horse so badly. He said that, “the governor told me in no circumstances was I to finish in the first six.”

Source: Sporting Life via Horsewatching by Dr Desmond Morris.

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